Sunday, May 10, 2009

A Special Day

When God Created Mothers
by Erma Bombeck

When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into his sixth day of “overtime” when an angel appeared and said, “You’re doing a lot of fiddling around on this one.”

And the Lord said, “Have you read the specs on this order?
· She has to be completely washable, but not plastic;
· Have 180 movable parts... all replaceable;
· Run on black coffee and leftovers;
· Have a lap that disappears when she stands up;
· A kiss that can cure anything from a broken leg to a disappointed love affair;
· And six pairs of hands.”

The angel shook her head slowly and said, “Six pairs of hands... no way.”

“It’s not the hands that are causing me problems,” said the Lord. “It’s the three pairs of eyes that mothers have to have.”

“That’s on the standard model?” asked the angel.

The Lord nodded. “One pair that sees through closed doors when she asks, ’What are you kids doing in there?’ when she already knows. Another here in the back of her head that sees what she shouldn’t but what she has to know, and of course the ones here in front that can look at a child when he goofs up and say, ’I understand and I love you’ without so much as uttering a word.”

“Lord,” said the angel, touching His sleeve gently, “Go to bed. Tomorrow...”

“I can’t,” said the Lord, “I’m so close to creating something so close to myself. Already I have one who heals herself when she is sick... can feed a family of six on one pound of hamburger... and can get a nine-year-old to stand under a shower.”

The angel circled the model of a mother very slowly. “It’s too soft,” she sighed.
“But she’s tough!” said the Lord excitedly. “You cannot imagine what this mother can do or endure.”

“Can it think?”

“Not only can it think, but it can reason and compromise,” said the Creator.
Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek. “There’s a leak,” she pronounced. “I told You You were trying to push too much into this model.”

“It’s not a leak,” said the Lord. “It’s a tear.”
“What’s it for?”
“It’s for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness, and pride.”

“You are a genius,” said the angel.
The Lord looked somber. “I didn’t put it there,” He said.


KGMom said...

Ah--that Erma--she always could bring a chuckle and a tear simultaneously.

To all mothers-- Happy Your Day!

Kerri Farley said...

Oh what a great post!
Happy Monther's Day!!

Beth said...

oh I miss Erma. That is perfect. Happy Mother's Day.

Ruth said...

I have never read that. How beautiful! Happy Mother's day.

Rae said...

I've read it before but it was nice reading it again. Thanks for sharing. Happy Mother's Day.

Anonymous said...

Great pots for Mother's Day! I always enjoyed Erma's take on life. Happy M Day to you.

Rudee said...

It's perfect, isn't it? Happy Mother's Day.

100 Thoughts of Love said...

i'm gonna cry.....happy mothers day to myself, because my 22 yearold who just arrived home, fresh college grad...will forget! your post is my card to myself!

This Is My Blog - fishing guy said...

Carolyn: What a neat tribute for mothers. I hope you have a great day.

Sam said...

What a nice post. I've never seen it before. Maybe I'll print it out and show it to my mom. Have a lovely Mother's Day, I hope the weather is as nice there as it is here!

(BTW - totally agree with you that problems with dogs and guests always come from the guests. Some people just don't like to listen. Hopefully this will go OK.)

Cheryl said...

Happy mothers day to you.......

I so enjoyed that, it made me smile and brought a tear.

I love how you always find something a little different.......

Janie said...

This is great. Erma always had great wisdom as well as a great sense of humor. Thanks for sharing.

Rae said...

Please stop by my blog to see the award I have nominated you for.

JeanMac said...

My first time reading and I got goose bumps. Thanks for posting it.

Dawn Fine said...


Happy Mothers Day!

Ziggy Stardust said...

Happy Mothers Day

Mary Isabella and Kiley too! said...

So Beautiful. Happy Mother's Day to you...m.

Rae said...

Carolyn, I forgot to tell you to post the award website url on your blog so that your followers can find the site and go vote for you.